I’m blue, or so I’m told

Had an odd encounter yesterday, one that even as I write this post Thursday afternoon has my head shaking. Apparently, at least based on the conclusion of a slightly deranged individual, I’m a “no good, liberal socialist” and I “want to destroy this country with my communist beliefs”.

Now to say I was taken aback by the outburst is an understatement. The conversation wasn’t about politics, nor could anyone’s comments be construed as anything even resembling a political statement. And it’s not like he should have been confused about we were saying as the conversation was about takeout restaurants.

Pretty much everyone went silent at that point. All I could think to say was “excuse me?”, to which I got a similar rant in reply. Now everyone had a befuddled look on their faces. Before I could get word out another conversation participant asked, “How did you come to that conclusion?”.

Now folks, I want you to know he was dead serious when he gave his answer. The look of disgust on his face would have been perfect if he had been delivering a punchline. He stood there in front of several witnesses, looked me dead in the eye, and told me I was a no good liberal communist because…

…I wear blue t-shirts.

At that point he would have had an easy out by acting like it was a joke because of the amount of people laughing. Comedians dream of a reaction like that when they tell a joke. Every single person who heard him was laughing hysterically. He would have looked like a hero if he’d started laughing too.

Instead, he doubled down.

I’d love to tell you what his rant was, but I and the others were laughing so hard none of us heard him clearly. The laughing only made him angrier as he then called everyone “worthless commies” and stormed away. Which made us laugh harder. At that point our conversation turned to how you could tell other things about people just based on the colors they wear. Being a male crowd there aren’t many I can share on a family blog, but I can tell you I’ll make sure to never wear chartreuse.

Once our conversation was over I wandered into the men’s room to get some tissue to wipe my eyes. They were watering so much from laughing they were starting to burn. It was there in the bathroom I discovered I was not a “no good, liberal socialist”, that instead I was a “heartless conservative villain”. I came to the concluding while splashing some cool water on my face to rinse out my eyes. the answer was right there in the mirror…

….I was wearing a red shirt.

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