The click-bait reviews of Star Wars: The Force Awakens

Note: This post contains massive spoilers from the film Star Wars: The Force Awakens. If you haven’t seen the movie and plan to, it might be best if you didn’t continue reading. Please consider that fair warning.

In case no one noticed, it’s been a long while since I made a post here. It was an intentional absence for a while as a bunch of projects came up all at one time and with little to no free time to blog I put this place on the back burner. Then over the summer I just never bothered to make time to update it. So now that we’ve reached the new year I’ve gotten a little extra time to try to get things rolling again. Unlike last time there won’t be a set schedule, just mostly “actual” random thoughts when I have them.

That being said, after seeing 2015’s most anticipated movie Star Wars: The Force Awakens, I decided it would be a good subject to restart the “Random thoughts of 210Darryl” blog with. Although it contains spoilers from the movie (last chance to turn back) this post isn’t specifically about Star Wars: The Force Awakens. What this post is mostly about is the click-bait postings that have popped up from people nit-picking over the film. You know the blogs, the ones that require a gazillion page loads to get to the end of their posting with them having introduced virtually nothing original nor entirely accurate.

For the record, I really liked Star Wars: The Force Awakens. I thought it was done well, and in the flavor set by the original trilogy. No, it’s not perfect, but it’s certainly better than the prequels and sets the stage very well for the next two movies. And that’s something many people nit-picking don’t seem to want to ignore: there’s going to be two more movies! Some of these so-called “plot holes” will likely be answered in those two films. So why the need for these slide-show style reviews? Well, each one of those is a page view. Every time you flip through one of those click-bait posts you end up giving the site owner tons of page views, increasing their ad revenue.

That’s really why some of these bloggers are nit-picking. They know Star Wars fans that loved the movie are going to click to see what the blogger is saying, so coming up with these little issues generates more page views. You’ll note that sites that don’t generate revenue in that manner (like this one, where I get nothing at all for page views) generally have more positive reviews of the movie. Let’s look at some of the things bloggers are nit-picking over.

We’ll start with Finn. Lots of bloggers saying they don’t get how if Finn worked in sanitation that he would have trained in weaponry and would have been going down to Jakku at the beginning of the movie. The answer is pretty easy: he lied. Finn was a stormtrooper and didn’t really want that information known to a lot of people, especially being surrounded be folks that might not take the news very well. Those same bloggers also ask how he could wield the lightsaber like he did. If one were to pay attention, he really didn’t use it all that well. Stormtroopers are trained with melee weapons, and a lightsaber is essentially a sword, which is exactly how Finn used it.

Moving on to Rey, I’ll bet every single question about her and her Force abilities will be answered in the next two movies. With only one third of the story being told is anything related to her really a plot hole? The only way to answer that is to see all three movies. Anything left unanswered would be a plot hole. For now, they’re just teasers.

There are lots of questions about Kylo Ren, and again, I think most of these will be answered in the next couple of movies. One thing that does seem clear is he doesn’t have a heck of a lot of training with the Force. His lightsaber duels with Finn and Rey mostly prove that. Look back at the lightsaber battles in the prequels between trained users in the force. Ren doesn’t fight like that at all. He generally fights like he’s wielding a sword. That’s why it takes a little bit of effort to beat Finn, and in part why an uninured Rey defeats him.

There is, however, one glaring plot hole that I doubt will be answered in the future movies. After Rey kills Han Solo Chewbacca goes nuts and essentially blows up everything around him, but when they all get back to D’Qar Chewbacca walks right past Leia, and it’s Rey that Leia wordlessly hugs. Now eventually we may learn what the bond between Leia and Rey is, but I can’t fathom a reason why Chewbacca would walk right past Leia.

Too bad I can’t find a way to get that one into a click-bait post.

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